K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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