So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
