I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Randomize
