I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize