Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
