This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
