Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
