Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
