i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
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