just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
