Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize