i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I touched a dick in church today
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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