Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Randomize