I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
i just google imaged poop.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Randomize
