i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I wish there were birth control emojis
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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