I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
