Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
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