weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize