I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
