i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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