I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
i believe in u and ur pee
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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