remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
