I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize