Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Randomize