The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
