Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
