Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Randomize
