I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Randomize