I don't remember. Are we still dating?
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
