the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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