So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
PANTIES FOUND
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
