There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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