i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I will be naked everywhere
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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