So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
