Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
