he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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