p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
