just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I want to be your penis for a week.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
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