is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
