Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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