so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
