If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
