today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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