its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
