Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
