Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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