to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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