trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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