At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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