Will you blow on my dice?
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize