Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
