Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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